INDIANS TAKE OVER BRIDGES’ OFFICE
When President George Bridges walked into his office last Tuesday morning, he expected to begin his regular morning routine: Take off his jacket, sharpen his number two pencils, and ring his secretary to make him some Color-Changing Instant Oatmeal. Little did he know that the night before members of the Walla Walla Navajo Indian Tribe had set up camp and taken over his room on the third floor of Memorial.
“I wasn’t expecting a pow-wow so early in the morning,” said Bridges. “But it truly is a beautiful culture the Indians … Native Americans have.”
The Walla Walla Navajo Indian Tribe claimed they had official rights to Bridges’ office, and informed him that they planned to move their official headquarters immediately. Although Bridges was initially off-put by the takeover, he was quick to see the good.
“He was very kind to us,” said PomPomPom, chief of the Walla Walla Navajo Indian Tribe. “He even offered us a box of Walla Walla sweet onions and a seat on the BSU Party Planning Committee. We took the onions.”
Bridges called the Princeton Review on Tuesday afternoon to inform them of the campus’ newest residents.
“The Native Americans have increased our average skin tone from eggshell to taupe, and have raised our happiness quota three percentage points,” said Bridges. “On the other hand, I think the percentage of scalpings will increase by 91 percent. So I’m planning a workshop for that.”
Other activities planned to celebrate the recent permanent arrival of the Walla Walla Navajo Indian Tribe on campus include Peyote Pinging, an “Improvised Little Bighorn” with Theatre Sports, a duck hunt and roast, and a midnight showing of “Dancing With Wolves” put on by ASWC Public Films.
“That’s my favorite movie, actually, but everyone kept calling me gay for wanting to show it. So this is the perfect opportunity,” said ASWC Films Chair Teal Greyhavens.
Just for good measure, President Bridges alongside faculty has planned a three-part program to deal with Walla Walla Navajo Indian issues at Whitman. On Sunday, there will be a town hall meeting from 7 p.m. to 9 p.m. in Cordiner Hall for community members to discuss their feelings, ideas and questions about the Indians and their underlying implications about headdress on campus. On Thursday, Nov. 9, a campus-wide symposium held by community leaders and faculty will take place from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. The symposium will explore the history of manifest destiny and the Washington Red Skins, casino and cigar implications in educational institutions, and the American history of “Pocahantas”, said Bridges. Finally, Bridges will be meeting with a working group of students and faculty throughout the year to discuss upcoming speakers, films and events that will speak to these issues.
“The students were unanimous (and passionate) in their desire to participate in the solutions and in working with faculty and staff in creating events and activities that Whitman will sponsor for the rest of the academic year,” said Bridges in an e-mail.
One Comment
Have you ever heard the compliment.: She was ahead of her time. In a few years, everyone will think this is hilarious. None too soon. It’s funny and dead on. You are poking pc, not Indians. Too bad people are so dense.
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